Love and Infatuation

Infatuation

1. is often based on nonsensical attributes, such as the way a person walks or laughs. Little things "send" you.
2. often depends largely on physical attraction- the chills, thrills, heartthrobs, and goosebumps felt when touching the other person.
3. often has a destructive and disorganizing effect on the personality, causing you to forget the realities of life.
4. often ends rapidly-- if you are not sexually involved. If sexually involved, this is not a valid sign.
5. often keeps you idealizing the other person so that you are unwilling to admit any faults might exist.
6. often causes family and friends to disapprove of your choice.
7. often dies quickly when the other person is gone.
8. often includes frequent quarrels, arguments and misunderstandings as a consistent part of the relationship
9. is more interested in what you can get from the relationship
10. often includes frequent and severe feelings of jealousy
11. is generally used to describe past relationships
12. often focuses on unsuitable persons.
13. often includes frequent feelings of guilt, insecurity, and frustration.
14. is most frequent among young adolescents and immature persons
15. can recur easily immediately after a previous love relationship has ended.
16. is often followed by boredom once sexual excitement dies off.
17. requires that the couple must depend on external amusement in order to enjoy themselves.
18. changes relationship very little even though you go together for a long time
19. is often accompanied by shallow feelings and sensations the simply "send" you.
20. often lasts only a short time.
21. often exploits the other person to your advantage
22. is always a poor basis for marriage.

LOVE

1.looks deeply into the compatibility of character traits, shared values, and common interests.
2. considers other factors besides physical attraction. Physical attraction will make up a smaller portion of the total relationship
3. brings out the best in you, promotes personal growth, self-respect, ambition, and improvement.
4. takes time to develop and mature. Just as it takes time to grow, it also takes time for genuine love to end.
5. recognizes fine qualities, but also recognizes qualities that are less then perfect.
6. brings approval of family and friends. they can see what your relationship does for both of you
7. can survive a separation
8. reduces tension as you work toward open discussion for solving problems without arguing.
9. is interested in sharing and giving to bring happiness and security to the other.
10. promotes trust and security which enables you to release the other person
11. usually describes present relationship
12. is more often directed to suitable persons.
13. is characterized by feelings of self confidence, trust and security.
14. grows over a period of time and comes with emotional and biological maturity
15. will develop slowly following a previous love affair
16. produces an ongoing sense of interest and joy when together.
17. sparks interest in each other and commonly shared activities.
18. charges and grows deeper with ongoing association
19. provides a climate of deepening feelings and growing intimacy as you share more of life with your lover
20. tends to last for a long period of time.
21. protects, nurtures and cares for the other person
22.is enough to build a marriage on- if all other factors are right.

credits to nancy pelt.author..the compleat courtship